Damian: “Did you know you boob is on your armpit? Look, I’m pointing right at it. Also: what the fuck am I saying lol I’m not even making any sense”

Hey kids! Remember that time in Hawk and Dove #6 when Hawk gave Blockbuster a blowjob?

Yeah me too D:
‘One night in Gotham’ indeed

The comics are alive
With the sound of LIIIIEFELLLLLLD
With stuff we’ll regret
For a hundred yeeears~

On the twelth day of DC
Liefeld gave to me
Twelve muscles clenching
Eleven heads long
Ten teeth a-gnashing
Nine ladies leviating
Eight spines a-breaking
Seven veins a-popping
Six million pouches
FIVE X TREMES
Four 90’s hairdos
Three awkward ‘fingers’
Two tiny feet
And a torso at 90 degrees

sleo:

So uhh. Liefeld is incorperating Batman into Hawk and Dove.

Look at this picture.

Now, serious question here.

Does Batman look like he’s supporting himself and swinging from building to building.

Or does he look like he’s holding a balloon?

Fucking Liefeld.

Written by ROB LIEFELD; Art and cover by ROB LIEFELD

Hawk and Dove arrive in Gotham City hot on the trail of a villain who has stolen a deadly weapon from their home turf in Washington D.C.! The trail leads from the nation’s capitol all the way to the doorstep of the Dynamic Duo. Get ready for Batman and…Dove?

Legendary creator Rob Liefeld flies solo in this issue with a story that’ll change the way you see Gotham forever!

all the way to the doorstep of the Dynamic Duo

So we might also possibly see Rob’s take on Damian?

Lord, who let Liefeld touch Batman again? I’m going to have a field day with this issue, I tell you.

I’ll admit it, sometimes I read Hawk and Dove for the lulz. I think it’s hilarious. I mean, of course it’s a comedy. There’s no way this was meant to be serious. Right?


 I mean, what is happening here? Has Hawk misplaced his crotch? Are his legs suddenly one big crotch? Or…

 Yeah, OK. Makes more sense than the original story anyway.

And when Hawk isn’t morphing into marine life, he rocks some wicked womanly curves. Like, I wish I had curves like that.



Also: hello, homoerotic subext. Except without the ‘sub’.

And the vilaness has some strange choices in colour co-ordination


’Strange’ as in ‘I had to do a double-take because that is waaay too close to her skin tone’. Apparently her power is flashing her victims into submission?

But then Deadman distracts us all by dropping acid and going to a psychedelic disco. Or something.

“What the hell? Normally I just dive right in and take over, but now the funky beat’s controlling ME”

All together now: “Oh Liefeld“   And the writer. And the colourist sometimes.

Revanche92 and I proudly present:

The Liefeld 2000!

Take out your frustration at Rob Liefeld’s terrible art in the comfort of your own home!

Remind Mr Liefeld how muscles are supposed to look by punching him repeatedly in the smug face with your own!

Comes with satisfyingly realistic audio screams!

Pouches sold seperately.

I don’t know what’s worse, your lack of diversity or your obsession with sales.
DC, I forgive you for rebooting the DCU. But why? Why on God’s earth…



IS HE STILL GETTING WORK?